In Memory of Bob 10/12/2018 – 6/15/2025
In the Hawaiian language, there is a word “Kahu” meaning honored attendant, caretaker, or guardian of an animal. This word has touched our hearts and resonates with our staff when we think about our cherished role in the lives of all these incredible cats that come into them, and the ones we guide into the beyond, paw in hand. Every now and then, we encounter a special kind of cat…one who is a “Kahu” to their own, a guardian, a protective spirit, a gentle paw at a defensive back.
Bob was one such cat, and this is his story.
Bob came to us in the fall of 2022, during a month when his black and white spots may be confused for a cow costume draping over a cat. Though Bob had a prominent belly, a moon-shaped face, and the specklings of a barnyard steer, he was, in fact, simply a cat. But calling him simply a cat would hardly do him justice, so let me elaborate.
Bob had been left behind. Can you believe it? It’s beyond us how someone could’ve looked at that precious tilted head, gentle expression, and generous primordial pouch and thought to do it, but someone did nonetheless. Bob was left with a woman who could not give him the care he needed and deserved as a feline leukemia cat. He initially tested negative at the vet, but later retested positive when we did bloodwork at Shadow Cats. This is why we always test them multiple times!
Still, some part of us must have known Bob belonged with us, even with that first negative test. When he first joined the ranks of the playful, bounding paws in Cookie’s Place, we knew one thing for certain: with us, Bob had found home. It didn’t take long for Bob to acclimate, and it became clear very quickly just how much of a love he was. You hardly ever saw Bob lying alone on the floor or sprawled out on a bed. He was always snuggling with another cat, grooming them, and teaching our little ones manners.
Bob was particularly fond of a cat named Amy, who had the most iconic straight bangs in her tabby coat pattern. They were frequent snuggle buddies, and there was a softness to their dynamic that was so sweet to behold. We called Amy Bob’s “first wife.” When Amy passed away, Bob found companionship in our precious Pixie. The two of them had a very unique dynamic, one that earned them the titles, “Mom & Dad of Cookie’s Place.”
We can’t imagine what it must be like to be so young, battling with something of such magnitude like feline leukemia. We give these kittens incredible sanctuary, medical care, and love, but for many of our little ones…a puzzle piece is missing. Pixie and Bob filled that void for every kitten who walked into the playpen of Cookie’s Place.
Playful kittens were encouraged, frightened kittens groomed, snuggled, and gently pushed into an exciting world made just for them. Unruly kittens were sometimes taught manners, though Pixie seemed more the disciplinarian than Bob ever was. Bob just had the gentlest spirit, something that could coax even the shyest kitten from their shell. When Pixie passed, Bob never stopped acting on his paternal instincts.
Many of those kittens didn’t make it to their first, second, third, or fourth birthdays because of the cruel reality of feline leukemia. But the life that they had, full of endless love, joy, and spirit, no matter how long or short, was always lived well. They were healthy until the day they weren’t, and rain or shine…Bob was beside them, providing a paternal security and warmth. Many kittens were raised in the time Bob has been with us, and perhaps he joined us when he did because the universe knew these sweet babies deserved their own kitty “Kahu.”
Just like we try not to have favorites, Bob treated all of these kittens with love. But two kittens, still with Shadow Cats today, stole his heart. Ebi and Nori came to us as tiny sisters, no more than three months old, and Bob immediately took them under his wing, guiding them well into adulthood. Nori became very independent, and her rebellious spirit had her acting not unlike a human teenager walking fifty paces ahead of their parents at the mall. She had places to be and none of them seemed to be snuggling up with Bob after a certain point, but he respected her space all the same.
Ebi, on the other hand, was a certified daddy’s girl. Right up to the end, Bob and Ebi were always seen snuggling and grooming each other. Ebi had somehow wound up being just as big, if not bigger, than our chubby cow-cat Bob. It was so cute to see them fill up a little kitty bed together with Bob usually grooming the top of Ebi’s head.
Not every group of kittens embraced Bob, but he was always there with a gentle paw at the ready. Purrsephone and Penelope come to mind, hissing and spitting at the sight of any cat, and yet Bob eagerly, patiently approached them as if to say, “It’s okay. The world isn’t as scary as you think.” That’s just the kind of cat he was. We were his “Kahu” but he was that to so many.
But Bob is defined by more than his relationship with other cats, sweet as it was. Bob had a quirky, sweet personality. He loved a lap, and he loved people. He also loved food, and you could expect him to stare longingly through the Cookie’s Place window like Inspector Javert, watching you distribute plates of wet food as he anxiously awaited his turn. He was always a very social eater, and after some time of getting attention, Bob would drift off to the dry food bowl to snack as though it were the perfect topper to a great interaction. And there was just nothing quite like seeing those big, round eyes looking up at you, paws tucked to his chest, and belly fully on display. Bob was somehow the perfect combination of sweet, loving, gentle, playful, and silly.
Each cat has their own unique, special personality. So often cats get lumped into a category of unloving, or independent, or even impartial…and while we love our cats with a little cattitude just as much as our sweet ones, there’s something to be said for Bob’s incredible spirit. There is just never going to be another cat like him, which is what makes it so painful to say goodbye.
Bob hadn’t been acting like his usual self, and in addition to a slight behavior change, he was struggling with intermittent fevers and abnormally enlarged, hardened lymph nodes beneath his lower jaw. When we felt them, we knew…but we didn’t want to believe it. We know the reality we face with feline leukemia positive cats, but there are some cats that become such a staple in our lives that it doesn’t seem possible for the cruelty of the virus to touch them. We had the lymph nodes tested, revealing an aggressive large cell lymphoma diagnosis. Our sweet boy deteriorated so quickly, we knew that the final gift we could give him was the gift of a peaceful passing.
On Father’s Day, an incredible day to honor the father of Cookie’s Place, who touched the lives of so many, we let Bob go. A concentrated storm hit us, a downpouring of rain quick and fast enough that not even windshield wipers could keep up in clearing a path. It felt, in that moment, that the sky itself grieved the loss of a unique soul, one so full of love, of light, eternal kindness and sweetness, that the world felt a little grayer the day he left us.
But it’s so easy to get wrapped up in the sadness. It’s so easy to see the sky darken, to lean into that feeling. But the truth of the matter is, that even in the sadness of his passing, there is beauty. Beauty in the lives he touched, in the souls he shepherded, in the laps he sprawled on, the foreheads he groomed, the very sunbeams he soaked into his golden spirit. Bob lived an incredible life at Shadow Cats, one that made him forget he was ever someone’s second choice, or not a choice at all. He was our choice.
He was ours.
And though we wept for him, though we circled him in tears and reminiscent laughter, we carried him to a higher plane together. Because he was ours and forever will be in our hearts. Now, Bob stands at the crossing into eternal peace, where there is no feline leukemia, where there is no cancer.
Across the rainbow bridge, in all its vividity and warmth, there are so many faces looking back at him. Amy and Pixie wait for him, and behind them, a Cookie’s Place trove. So many eternal kittens and young friends, shepherded to peace with Bob’s endless outpouring of love, now wait to do for him what he did for them…to guide them into happiness, to the warmth of an eternal sun, to the tickle of endless grass, the perfume of forever flowers. Bob can recline in the evergreen pastures, in the peace beyond all things, the perfect place for our perfect cow cat.
Thank you to Bob’s amazing sponsors, Jeni J, Anne K, and Karen S. Thank you to the volunteers who showered Bob with as much love as he always deserved, to the incredible staff who made every one of his days count. To the wonderful care he received at Vista Vet. Thank you to everyone who ever looked at Bob’s sweet little tilted face and wondered when in the world Shadow Cats started rescuing cows!
We love you, Bob. We always will. Forever our guardian, our gentle spirit…”Kahu.”
Bob had 3 Sponsors
Jeni Johnson
Anne Llana Koob
Karen Schnell